There is a specific kind of car that does everything, asks nothing, and quietly makes every other car in its price bracket look like it is trying too hard. The facelifted BMW M340i is that car, and spending a week with it is a lesson in how little you actually need to be very, very fast.
The numbers are almost beside the point, but here they are: a 3.0-litre straight-six making 374 horsepower, xDrive all-wheel drive, and a 0-100 time that dips just under 4.4 seconds. It never feels like it is working.
On the road
What surprises is the breadth. In Comfort the M340i is a genuinely relaxing long-distance tool, the adaptive dampers rounding off broken tarmac that would have the pure M3 fidgeting. Switch to Sport and the rear axle wakes up, the exhaust finds its baritone, and the whole car shrinks around you.
The steering is the one area where BMW has traded feel for precision. It is fast and accurate but quiet at the rim; you learn to trust the front axle rather than feel it.
It is the rare fast car that makes you a better driver by never punishing you for being a worse one.
— From the road-test notes
Verdict
On track the xDrive system shuffles torque with an intelligence that makes clumsy inputs look tidy. It will not intimidate you, and for most owners that is exactly the point.
Is it the only car you need? For a huge number of buyers, honestly, yes. The M340i is the quiet, sensible, devastatingly complete answer to a question most people over-complicate.